Revival of Love
by Shahula
Summary: "You have wasted the gift which the fates have given you, blowing the seed away when it should have been planted. Time is a clock, moving forward each moment we remain, but your time is fast running out." Bella must find the love from her past to ensure a happy future, but going through the ghosts of boyfriends past could make for a long holiday indeed. AH, BxE, Rated M
1. Chapter 1

_Standard disclaimer applies: I don't own Twilight nor do I profit from this work. Please don't steal from me._

**Prologue**

Bella wasn't really sure what to think.

The room was dim, draped in scarves of deep red and orange, golden light filtering softly from the small lamp in the corner.

Bella sat at a little table, her hands folded in her lap as she chewed on her lip, one sneaker-clad foot tapping restlessly on the hardwood floor.

She'd seen each of her girlfriends disappear into this back room over the course of the evening, a few giggling and intrigued like Alice; while others, like Kate, were a harder sell, skepticism clear on their faces.

Yet each time someone returned, an awed and impressed glaze swam in their eyes.

Even the hardest disbeliever, Rose, had come back into the room with her mouth slightly gaping as she took a seat near Bella on the slim couch. Though Bella tried to question her on what exactly had happened, Rose was - for likely the first time ever - too overcome to speak.

And now, it was Bella's turn.

She took a deep breath as the door along the far wall opened with a groan, an older woman in flowing skirts and shawls gliding into the space.

Bella took a deep breath, her heart picking up pace in her chest inexplicably when she met the clearest ice-blue eyes she'd ever seen.

The woman stared at Bella, her gaze unyielding but not unkind as she studied her for a few long, silent minutes.

"You are nervous," she spoke, her voice low.

Bella shook her head, opening her mouth to speak but was unable to get a word out before the woman held up a hand, her fingers coated in rings of silver, turquoise and gold.

"It's no matter, I don't need your faith to make the fates speak."

"I don't _not_ believe," Bella interjected, her need to defend herself leaping forward unexpectedly. It was true, too. She didn't have nearly the skepticism Kate or Rosalie had when they'd first planned the evening. Growing up with a spiritual mother ingrained some belief in the supernatural and mystic in Bella but, still, she was her father's daughter - and Charlie Swan did not believe in psychics.

"Yes, I can see that you've been touched by the spirits," the woman continued, her eyes canvassing the space around Bella's small frame. "That will make things easier for Madame Tanya."

Bella nodded, but kept her mouth closed. She resumed chewing her lip, her nerves unsettled as the psychic continued to stare directly at her with her icy eyes.

"Should I—" Bella began, offering her hand across the cloth covered tabletop after a few long, strained minutes of silence.

"Your eyes are telling, child," Madame Tanya said, ignoring the open palm resting before her. "Deep pools that reflect your soul. I will have no trouble reading you."

"Now, you've come here with no regard for yourself, seeking only to please those you cherish," Madame Tanya spoke. Bella retracted her hand, sliding back in her chair to listen.

"You care for others strongly, loving with an open heart easily. But it is that heart that has broken you repeatedly."

Bella inhaled sharply, her mouth twisting slightly at the assessment, the arrow of the woman's words quickly marking their target. It was true; Bella did love deeply and freely, but had been burned in the past.

Still, this wasn't anything difficult to guess, Bella reasoned. Any woman in her mid-twenties who was still unmarried was bound to have endured a broken heart or two. Not to mention, one of the girls may have said something about Bella during their session.

As Madame Tanya continued to give an assessment of Bella's life including her relationship to her family, her job and her friends, Bella felt neither convinced nor dissuaded from believing the woman's predictions. It was all basic, easy-to-garner information.

Hell, all you needed was a Facebook page in this day and age to acquire some of the stuff this woman was saying.

But then, in an instant, Madame Tanya's words gripped Bella's heart, her heart rate picking up as she spoke of things no one but Bella could know.

"You worry for your father, that he will not find love again. You must let this go, girl, as it does your heart no good. He shall be well. Your mother shines brightly in your soul, her presence still strong though she lives at a great distance. Visit her before your next year, as it will bring good fortune to your families. As for you concerns with your friend, you may release those fears. The fates have aligned to give her what she most desires, twicely. And the spirit of the past shall linger no longer, the peace he sought has been found."

"How do you know—" Bella started, her eyes nearly bugging out of her head.

"It is _yourself_ you must look after now, child," Madame Tanya went on. "You must find your own way to happiness, before the path is blocked from you forever. Too long you've placed the fates on hold, and they will wait no longer."

"What do you mean?" Bella asked curiously, her nerves prickling in anticipation. She licked her dry lips, her logical mind at war with her free-spirited heart.

Suddenly, this reading didn't seem so ridiculous anymore.

"The time for stalling is over, Bella," Madame Tanya said seriously, her eyes seeming to glaze over. "You have wasted the gift which the fates have given you, blowing the seed away when it should have been planted. Time is a clock, moving forward each moment we remain, but your time is fast running out."

"Are you saying I'm going to die?" Bella blurted out, fear in her dark eyes.

"No, not yet. Your time is still long in years yet, but if you don't mend the thread you've broken, you shall spend those years miserable and alone."

"What thread? What did I break?"

Heavy silence filled the room, the blue ice of the psychic's eyes seeming to freeze further as she looked just beyond Bella, her gaze clearly in another place.

"The very fabric of your being; your soul's heart. You must find him, reclaim his heart and the love you cast aside, and then build it back up together."

"What are you talking about? Who? Whose heart?"

Madame Tanya's eyes refocused, finding Bella in the present again as she spoke. "I don't know, child. That knowledge is hidden in your heart, and though my eyes see far, they cannot reach that part of you. You must discover it yourself."

With that, Madame Tanya rose, signaling the end of her session with Bella.

"Wait, I don't understand, what am I supposed to do? How long do I have to figure this out?" Bella pleaded.

Madame Tanya reached for Bella's hand, her thin nails scratching over Bella's palm, sending chills down her spine. "See this line, here, it tells of your broken path in love. And it splits, here," she continued, circling the jagged-edged line. "This is your current path. If you don't rediscover your heart before the new year, you'll travel this path, long and alone," Madame Tanya explained, tracing the long, thin line. She moved back to the split, tracing the delicate trail with many criss-crossed lines, which spoke of love and fulfillment. "But find him, and you'll see what joy fate brings you in your coming years."

With that, Madame Tanya left in a swirl of bright colors and heavy perfume, leaving Bella alone in the semi-darkness.

The frantic beating of Bella's heart clamored with the psychic's haunting prediction, each echoing in her ears.

Her time to find love was quickly running out.

* * *

**a/n: What the hell is this, Shahula? I know, I know… why am I starting a new story when I haven't finished AtPM or IStM? Well… I'm sort of stuck, and this is my attempt to get unstuck.**

**That said I have no idea what I'm doing with this story. I have a general plan of where I'd like to see this go, and I plan on this being a quick ficlet that hopefully will update frequently and finish before the New Year. **

**Also, I'm obviously not getting this beta'd at present. I'm sure mauigirl06 will have something to say about that, but I think she deserves a break from my grammar mistakes now and again. So please forgive my mistakes and don't think it's any fault of hers. **

**If you'd like to review, I would love that. If you are up for it, I hope to see you back here again soon. **


	2. Chapter 2

**1.**

Bella was a fairly practical woman, living her life with a cautious appreciation for the whimsical, but firmly rooted in logic. So, it was with this mindset and ingrained conditioning that Bella pushed aside Madame Tanya's warning.

Sure, she'd gotten pretty riled up that late May evening she and her girlfriends decided to visit a psychic, but that was all nonsense, if Bella put any real thought into it.

She determined the whole evening to have been a fluke, the combination of alcohol, a long workday and the lure of the mystic combining to make her more susceptible to the predictions she'd been given. In the light of a new day, and with a clear and rested mind, Bella could see the truth.

Madame Tanya was nothing but a perceptive woman who tapped into those desires and fears that most women had; the longing for love.

Bella conveniently shoved the other prophecies Madame Tanya touched on under the rug of her mind, not allowing herself to dwell on how she may have known about them. When she and her girlfriends reconvened later in the week, laughing and discussing that crazy night, Bella didn't share the ominous warning, instead, only offering up the lighter information she was told.

Alice had been skeptic that Bella didn't learn more when everyone else had shared possibly life-changing predictions, but Bella wasn't swayed. She wasn't going to be made a fool by a stranger.

The days turned to weeks and led to months where Bella carried on about her normal routine, happy and satisfied in her singledom, though it was amazing the changes some of her friends experienced. Especially since those changes so closely mirrored what had been predicted for each of them.

Alice was finally making a name for herself, becoming one of Seattle's prominent personal shoppers, not to mention that she and her long-time fiancé, Jasper Hale, had finally set a date for their wedding, a week before Christmas. That in itself was an accomplishment, since the couple had been engaged for two years.

Kate had discovered a new way to create a light bulb filament which burned brighter, longer and more cleanly than any before. To say her life was moving ahead at lightning speed wouldn't be a lie. Even more surprising to Bella was Kate's interest in one man, Garrett, since all her preceding love interests tended to not last longer than one night.

But, what really pushed Bella over the edge and into paranoia was Rosalie.

Because Rosalie was pregnant.

After three years of trying in every possible way that science knew of, but always resulting in heartache when the results came back negative, Rose and her husband Emmett were finally going to have a baby.

Twins, in fact.

Rose's phone call that proclaimed Madame Tanya as the real deal for having seen it coming shook something in Bella.

It clicked into place how many of her friends' predictions had come true, making Bella rethink her hasty dismissal. It seemed their futures were aligning as Madame Tanya had claimed, and it made Bella wonder if any from her own reading had.

She thought over her time since May, seeing the pieces connect one after the other.

She had visited her mother in July, reconnecting with Renee as they sipped piña coladas on the sunny Key West beaches, laughing and sharing warm memories of childhood and love. When she'd returned back to Seattle, Bella received exciting news from work; she would be writing her own weekly column for the paper, a position that was highly coveted at The Seattle Bugle.

Even her own father was finally finding love, connecting with Sue Clearwater after they had crossed paths at a Halloween safety program at Forks Elementary.

Just like Madame Tanya said would happen.

So, when Bella hung up the phone, still hearing Rosalie's awed and exuberant voice in her ear from sharing her good news, she knew she was in trouble.

Too many things had happened to excuse them as being coincidences. It had to be more, and if it was like the gypsy psychic said, Bella was in big trouble.

Already, Thanksgiving was looming on the horizon, which had Christmas nipping at its heels.

And, then, New Years.

What the hell was she going to do?

She couldn't deny it any more, Madame Tanya had been right.

Bella would be alone for the rest of her life, unless she could find the man from her past who she'd already dismissed as not being the one.

"Shit!" Bella exclaimed. She had to fix this, and now.

Bella jumped up from the couch in her living room, rushing to the small desk in the kitchen nook and yanked open a drawer, grabbing out the discarded calendar. She quickly flipped to December, taking a red pen and circling the thirty-first several times.

It was her own personal D-Day; without it, Bella knew she would be destined to a lonely life.

Now, she needed a plan.

Before she could formulate one, Bella's phone rang, muffled slightly by the couch cushion it had been buried under in her haste to get to her desk.

Bella snatched it up, quickly answering before it could go to voicemail.

"Hello?" she answered with a breathless tone.

"Well, hello! You sound a little worked up. Am I interrupting something important? 'Cause you know you don't need to stop on my account. Just put me on speaker and carry on, Bella."

Bella rolled her eyes, flopping down on the sofa before she spoke. "You wish, Cullen."

"If you only knew, sweetheart," he teased.

"Shut up, Edward," Bella scolded ineffectually, a smile clear in her voice. "I haven't heard from you in a while. What's up? You and Hell Bitch still going strong?"

Bella had never hidden her displeasure from Edward when it came to his on-again-off-again girlfriend, Chelsea since she'd met her nearly a year ago. It was a disastrous night all the way around, starting with an impromptu meeting when Chelsea invited herself along to Bella and Edward's customary 'in-the-city dinner'. It had ended with a trip to the ER, where Bella left with a cast on her wrist thanks to Chelsea "accidently" bumping into Bella on the pier, knocking her off with only her hands to break the fall.

If it hadn't been for Edward, Bella would have killed the ditzy blonde right then and there. As it was, only the calming hand of her high school best friend could keep Bella from exacting her revenge.

Still, she was sure to offer her unsolicited opinion on Edward's girlfriend whenever the opportunity presented itself. Luckily, she and Edward had a solid friendship that could withstand the sharp tongues and finely-worded barbs they often threw at each other.

Sighing, Edward said, "You'll be happy to know, Hell Bitch and I have officially called it quits; for good this time."

Bella snorted. "I've heard that before."

"I mean it this time, Beans. I'm over her brand of crazy and all it entails. Besides, if I ever need any crazy, I'll just come find you," Edward joked.

Bella cringed, realizing how right Edward might be given her recent realization. Still, she wasn't going to back down from finding her heart's true path. Not when the gloomy prediction was so close to coming to fruition.

Hell, if she didn't think he'd laugh her ear off, she might even ask him for his help. Not that he could do much from across the country.

"Well, don't call me when she shows up on your door in two days in only a trench coat and heels, ready to go and you let her in for the night, but she never leaves."

"Hey, that happened _one_ time! You can't hold that against me forever," Edward cried, his rich laugh rolling gently against Bella's ear.

She smirked, though he couldn't see it. "Yeah, well, I can and I will. I was the one who had to rescue your ass from that bitch, telling a lie about you being shipped out for an emergency, year-long photo shoot in Yemen."

"God, that was a good one. I miss that show," Edward said nostalgically.

"Me, too. Nothing beats 'Friends'," Bella agreed.

"Speaking of missing friends, I miss you, Beans," Edward said, his tone serious.

"I miss you too, Teddy." She did, too - so much. There really wasn't anyone quite like Edward for Bella.

He just got her.

"Good, 'cause I've got some news. You ready?"

"Shoot," Bella replied, her fingers mindlessly twisting strands of her dark brown hair around her fingers.

"I'm coming home; for good."

Bella stopped short, her breath hitching. "Really?"

"Yep. Got a gig to work for the Seattle Times Weekly, lead photographer."

"Oh my God, Edward! That's fantastic news! When are you coming?"

"Right before Thanksgiving, so in like a week, I guess. I don't know exactly, semantics that I'll work out later," Edward dismissed in his typical fashion. Bella rolled her eyes again, knowing it would be her job, along with his mother Esme, to get Edward set up. He really was an overgrown child sometimes, but she loved the idiot.

"It'll be nice to be back home in time for the holidays," he told her.

"Your mother is going to flip to have her baby back in town for good. I'm so excited!" Bella exclaimed.

"Me too, Beans. It's going to be awesome to annoy the shit out of you in person again," Edward teased.

Bella laughed, unwilling to agree out loud though she really did. No one knew her better, both how to annoy and entertain, soothe and anger her, than Edward.

And that was why she was going to enlist him to help her find her true love before time ran out.

* * *

**a/n: Just wanted to say a quick thank you for all the love and support for this little fic! And you'll be happy to know, mauigirl60 told me I couldn't take a break from letting her beta, so this looks a hell of a lot better thanks to her. ;)**

**See you soon!**


	3. Chapter 3

**2.**

It was two days after Thanksgiving, and Bella couldn't put it off any longer.

She was going to tell Edward about the psychic's ominous warning and ask for his help, if she could only figure out how without Edward laughing his ass into the New Year.

Bella wasn't completely sure Edward wouldn't have her committed for believing in this insanity, but with all the signs pointing to Madame Tanya being right, Bella was willing to risk it.

She was counting on Edward's adventurous spirit and years of back-owed favors to ensure he would.

When she heard his rap on the door, she took a deep breath to steady her nerves before going to answer the door. It swung open to reveal Edward, his long frame leaning against the wall in a dark fitted shirt, faded jeans and a smirk firmly in place on his full lips.

"Hey," he greeted, offering a nod. "It feels like forever since I saw you last."

Bella laughed, waving him in as she said, "Yeah, because Black Friday shopping was soooo long ago." Bella led him into her living room, taking a seat on the couch while Edward sat beside her. "By the way, I'm never doing that shit again. Even for you and your mother with your green puppy-dog eyes and pouty lips."

"But, Bella," Edward pouted, turning to Bella and showing her just how difficult it would be to keep that promise. "What if I need —"

"Knock it off," Bella joked. "You know those people were crazy. I still can't believe that old lady ran over that woman with her wheelchair for a stupid One Direction doll. She didn't even say she was sorry, just cackled like a loon!"

"Yeah, but she got her back with the water on the floor. I think Granny's face plant and cracked nose more than made up for broken toes," Edward laughed.

The pair continued to talk, catching up on various things they hadn't yet had the chance to. Edward had found an apartment easily, thanks in large part to Bella, and had gotten moved in quickly. He was only a few blocks from Bella which was great for her, knowing he was close by, after too many years of miles between them.

It was difficult when they'd separated halfway through college; Edward deciding college wasn't for him, choosing to pursue his dream of becoming a photographer instead. Bella supported him, always, but hated that Edward ended up moving to the east coast when she was still in Washington.

It put a strain on their relationship in the beginning but, in time, they found a groove that worked for them; it sustained them throughout the last four years as Edward traveled the United States and Bella set up her life in Seattle.

Although, now he was back, and finally free of his heinous girlfriend.

Bella never understood why Edward insisted on dating girls like Chelsea; dramatic, unimpressive and inflatable - usually blonde with little-to-no ambition, unless you counted landing a husband.

Not that Bella could say much, considering the disaster her own love life was, as Madame Tanya had so clearly pointed out.

Sighing as she finished rinsing the last dish from dinner, Bella handed it to Edward as she thought about her sad love life.

"What's the trouble, Beans?" Edward asked, bumping Bella on the hip as he dried the dish before setting it aside. "You seem low all of a sudden."

Bella bit her lip, wavering for a moment before nodding decisively.

It was now or never, she had to tell him.

"Um, well actually… I have something I want to talk to you about," Bella said.

"That sounds ominous. Should I be worried? You aren't going to tell me you're into the Fifty Shades of Shit are you? 'Cause I know it's almost Christmas, but I was thinking of getting you a scarf, not a sex swing. Although, now that you mention it…"

"Shut up, you ass! I'm not into that…" Bella trailed off, her cheeks flushing a little. She wasn't about to tell Edward she'd read the books and happened to get a little bothered by a few of the scenes. And then read them over and over again on lonely Saturday nights.

She made her way back to the living room, Edward on her heels as he laughed, "Just checking. I didn't think you were, but you know what they say about the quiet ones. And you can be awfully quiet…" he said, a wicked gleam in his eyes.

Bella shook her head, not willing to touch that one.

"Anyway, it's not about my sex life," Bella started to explain. "Well, not really. I mean, it sort of is, but it's more than that, and I know you're going to laugh but it's really important to me and, yes, it is kind of crazy but if figured if anyone would get it, it would be you, and you're my best friend so you have to help me," Bella rushed out.

"Whoa," Edward said, his hands up to stop her. "You just said a hell of a lot without actually saying anything, Bella. What are you talking about? You know if I can help you, I will," Edward told her, his playful teasing gone.

Bella inhaled deeply and reached for one of Edward's hands, wanting the comfort his touch always gave her. Licking her lips, she looked up and said, "I have to find the love of my life before the end of the year or I'm going to end up alone and miserable forever."

Edward stared blankly for a few moments before his brow crinkled. "You have to—wait, what?"

"I have to find my soulmate before New Year's or I won't ever find him. And, the worst part is that I've already dated him. Or so the psychic, Madame Tanya, said," Bella explained with a little huff.

Edward blinked, his long lashes dusting his cheeks momentarily. It only took another few seconds before he cracked, his head lulling back as his mouth fell open in raucous laughter, his hand slipping from Bella's as he grabbed onto his waist.

"You—you, oh, shit… Oh, my God," he cried, doubling over with a loud snorting laugh. Bella wanted to be pissed at his response, but she knew it would happen.

It was her own fault for just blurting it out, really. That didn't mean he needed to be such an ass about it.

"Quit laughing, jerkoff!" Bella told him, slapping him on the shoulder and chest several times to get him to calm down.

Edward was finally able to get himself under control, his laughs simmering down to soft chortles and giggles.

"All right, okay, I'm sorry. But, come on, Bella. A psychic told you this? And you believed her?" Edward admonished, shaking his head. "If you believe that, I've got some oceanfront property in Arizona you could buy."

"Thank you, Captain Unoriginal. I know it sounds ridiculous, okay, but… it's not. There have been signs," Bella said, her voice faltering slightly. Her chin dropped, insecurities and doubt flooding her.

If Edward wouldn't help her, if she couldn't convince him, her best friend, to believe in this, how the hell was she suppose to get an ex to listen?

Edward reached for her hand, wrapping his long fingers around her small ones. "Hey, Beans, I'm sorry. I didn't know you were serious about this. You can talk to me. I'll listen, I swear."

Bella found his eyes with hers, seeing nothing but honesty. She nodded, knowing he was really going to listen to her and, hopefully, help when the time came.

He may have been an asshole sometimes, but when it counted, Edward always came through for her. Bella was sure this situation, though unlike any they'd ever had before, would be no different.


	4. Chapter 4

**3.**

"Are you sure about this, Bella?" Edward asked, concern on his face as he watched her over his coffee cup.

Bella bit her lip, her foot nervously tapping against the chair rungs underneath the table top. She wasn't too proud to admit she was scared, but the possibility of being alone for the rest of her life outweighed any embarrassment she might endure on the path to finding love.

She'd already told Edward, the one person's opinion she cared most about. When he'd finally gotten himself under control and saw how serious Bella was, he was supportive, so there wasn't much more to fear.

Or so Bella told herself.

Bella pushed her nerves away, bobbing her head resolutely and turned determined eyes to her best friend. "Yeah, definitely. I know this may seem crazy, but I can't let that stop me. Besides, even if this whole thing is a lie, it won't hurt to find out what my old boyfriends are up to, right?" she said.

Edward nodded, a warm look in his eye that quickly turned mischievous. "Right. What's it going to hurt? I'm happy to help you drag up the ghosts of boyfriends past, those poor souls who couldn't hold your heart."

"Shut up," Bella laughed, slapping his shoulder. "Now, help me make a list."

Edward agreed, sipping at his hot tea while Bella pulled up a blank Word document. Once she was ready, fingers hovering over the keys, she blanked. She had no idea where to start.

"Um…"

"What?" Edward asked.

"I don't know how to go about this. Who should I write down? Like, every boy I've ever been interested in, or maybe only those I dated? Should it only be guys I've slept with?"

"That's a short and very vanilla list, I'm sure," Edward joked, earning him another slap.

"Hey! Unlike you, I don't tell _you_ everything about my sex life, jackass. You might be surprised at what I'm like in bed."

"Oh, how I wish I did know, Beans," Edward sighed, his eyes seeming to glaze over dreamily. "If only you'd let me sleep with you on prom night, I could offer more insight into that area."

Bella rolled her eyes. He was forever taunting her over their very brief dating history. Bella had had a silly schoolgirl crush on Edward in high school, and he took pity on her by asking her to prom when no one else had.

Bella spent the night realizing how out of her league Edward was, as girls continually shot her looks of disapproval, constantly cutting into their dances and stealing Edward away.

When Edward took her home, Bella gave him a soft kiss on the lips and thanked him for being her friend, the feelings she held for him pushed far away as she accepted her fate.

She wasn't meant to be with Edward as anything more than a friend and she was okay with that.

Still, to this day, Edward liked to joke about the plans he'd had for their night together, cut short when Bella claimed to feel ill and wanted to head home instead of going to any after-prom parties.

"Isn't it enough you gave me that stupid nickname that night?" Bella groused, trying her best to hide her smile. She really loved the nickname, even though she refused to admit it. Edward had seen a small cluster of freckles on her lower back, right above the swell of her ass where her prom dress dipped low. The long stream of her dark hair, twisted in curls and delicate braids had Edward likening her to Jack and the Beanstalk, thus the nickname of Beans.

"It sure is! And don't deny you love it when I call you Beans. I know you do," he told her. "Just think of all the other names I could call you after all our years of friendship. I've seen you sick as a dog, high as a kite and everything in between, so it could have been worse."

"I could say the same for you, Teddy," Bella quipped, raising a challenging brow. "Spring Break 2007 ring any bells?"

"Good point. And that's the only reason I let you get away with calling me Teddy," Edward conceded.

"Edward," Bella went on after a few moments, flicking her spoon around her own coffee mug. "Can you be serious? How do I know who I should contact again? I haven't gotten around as much as some people," she said, giving him a pointed look, "but my dating history isn't that short either. Where do I start, who do I look for as the lost one?"

Edward sighed, reaching for Bella and resting their entwined fingers on the table. "Okay, I'll be serious. Now, the gypsy said a lost love, right? Well then, you probably don't need to list everyone you've ever dated, just the ones you felt something real with. Start there."

Nodding, Bella shifted her focus back to her computer screen. "Okay, um… I guess the first guy would be my 9th grade boyfriend, Benjamin Morsey."

"Benny Morsey, the kid who liked to play with dirt? Really? I didn't know you two dated," Edward said in surprise.

"It was before you moved to Forks. We dated most of sophomore year and I was madly in love with him until I caught him feeling up Tia Rodriguez behind the science lab. It was really more like puppy love, but that was my first real relationship that had adult emotions, so it should count."

"Okay, sure. Put him down. Who else?"

Bella thought back, skipping over those men she causally dated or she knew were no longer on the market. She wrote down a few more names, turning the laptop to Edward when she was done.

Edward looked over the names, his jaw flexing a few times before he schooled his features and turned to Bella with a smirk. "Not much of a list, but it's a start. You sure you want to include this tool?" he said, pointing at a name near the end of the list.

"Yes, Edward. I know you can't stand him, but we dated for two years. I think I should actually start with him, don't you? I mean, it's only been a little over a year since we split, so maybe he's the one."

"Fine, but I'm not letting you go see him alone. There's no telling what that asshat might say to upset you," Edward told her, his lips set in a hard line as fire flashed in his green eyes.

"If you want to, but you have to promise not to punch him."

"I will do no such thing."

"Edward, if he's the one and you punching him makes me lose my chance at love, I will never forgive you," Bella told him firmly.

Edward huffed, but nodded. "Fine, you can talk to him but if he even looks like he's going to say something offensive or hurtful, I get to deck him, agreed?"

"Agreed. But it won't come to that, Edward. We ended things peacefully."

"Whatever you say, Bella," Edward said with a dismissive wave of his hand. "When do you want to go see him?"

"As soon as possible. I don't have time to waste. I'll talk to Alice and see if she knows if he'll be around this weekend."

Edward grunted, but made no further comment about seeing Bella's ex, choosing instead to beg Bella to go shopping with him, claiming he needed her expert opinion on what to buy to fill his empty apartment.

Bella was happy to oblige, since spending time with Edward was never a hardship, despite what she sometimes told him.

Besides, he would be helping her out soon in a big way, so it was the least she could do.


	5. Chapter 5

**4.**

Bella fiddled with the silverware on the table, unrolling the napkin before rolling it up once more around the utensils. She was a little nervous, not knowing how her lunch date would go.

Bella was ready to get her destiny back on track, and hopefully this lunch would be the right place to start.

"Sorry I'm late," Alice offered, sliding into the seat across from Bella, letting her oversized purse hit the floor. "Traffic was insane coming off 520, but I should have known better on a Friday afternoon, right?"

"Undoubtedly," Bella agreed. "I'm glad you could make it though, I know how crazy things are with the wedding in a few weeks. How's that going, by the way? Do you need any help?"

Alice waved a hand dismissively. "No, it's going fine. Between my mom and Jas, it's all under control. Not exactly the small, intimate affair we were hoping for, but I'm excited for it," Alice explained, a spark in her hazel eyes.

"Well, promise you'll let me know if you need anything. I feel like a slacker bridesmaid," Bella grumbled.

"You're fine, Bella. I know you've been busy, what with Edward back in town, not to mention the holidays just around the corner. It's fine, really. But I do expect a fabulous engagement party, so I hope you've got that going," she said with a raised brow and half smile.

"On my honor, it will be a kick-ass party. I've got Edward's many years of partying to help me plan that," Bella said, holding a hand up in promise.

"Thank God he's good for something, besides breaking hearts," Alice joked. The women laughed before settling down, ordering food and sipping on drinks as they caught up on their lives.

"Okay, B. You know I love grabbing lunch with you, but it sounded like you had a reason for wanting to meet. So what's up?"

Bella reached for her water, wetting her dry throat as she bought herself another minute.

She knew this moment was coming, but making the words actually leave her mouth was a little more dubious than Bella thought it would be.

After all, this was Alice. If anyone was going to be a believer in the psychic's predictions for Bella's life, it would be her.

Bella's hesitation didn't stem from telling Alice about her sudden change of heart, but instead, in getting the information she needed to put her plan in motion.

"Okay, um, well…remember back in May when we went to that psychic? I kind of…" Bella mumbled, playing with the empty straw wrapper on the table. "I didn't exactly tell you guys everything she told me."

"I knew it!" Alice shouted in triumph, her eyes gleaming. "I knew you were holding back, there was no way she didn't tell you more."

"You're right, she did. I just didn't want to believe it but after this summer, with everyone else's readings coming true - first yours then Kate's, and Rose getting pregnant - I started thinking over what she told me and some of it had already come true."

"Right, yes. And…?"

"And now, well… I'm in trouble," Bella said. She quickly held up a hand, stopping Alice from jumping to the wrong conclusion, as her expression suggested she was already doing. "It's not that bad, well, it _is_ but probably not like you're thinking."

"Just tell me, Bella. The suspense is killing me," Alice pleaded.

So, she did, laying everything out for Alice that had happened since the reading until just a few days ago, when she and Edward had come up with a plan to find the love of her life.

"Wow. That's a lot to do in just a few short weeks," Alice breathed. "What can I do to help?" she asked, friendly determination on her face.

Bella smiled, the pressure in her chest releasing with Alice's words. "Thank you, Alice. I knew you'd understand."

"Of course, Bella," Alice said, with a smile.

"Okay, well. Edward suggested I narrow down my list of ex-boyfriends to just those guys who I'd been in love with, or at least thought I was. And um, well that includes…"

"Oh," Alice said, slumping against her seat.

"Oh, yeah." Bella knew this was the real hurdle, she just hoped Alice was willing to help her jump it.

Alice may have been one of Bella's best friends, but Alice was about to be family to Bella's ex, so the line was fuzzy at best.

"Bella I don't know if that's a good idea," Alice finally said, her eyes regretful.

"I know. But I can't help but think Peter might have been the real one. We dated for two years, Alice. And it's only been a year since we broke up, so it's possible the feelings are still there."

"That's true. But still, you broke up for a reason. And I know for a fact that reason is still valid," Alice said seriously.

Bella licked her lips, shaking her head. "No, it's not. I don't care if he has to travel for work. I mean, really, what are a few months out of the year without the love of your life?" Bella chuckled, though it didn't sound convincing.

"I don't think that was the real reason you two split," Alice said.

Bella met Alice's gaze, sighing when her friend did nothing but raise a challenging eyebrow. "Alice."

"Don't 'Alice' me. Tell me he's not the reason you broke up."

"He's not the reason we broke up."

Alice pursed her lips.

"Okay, fine, he may have had something to do with it, but he's not the _only_ reason we broke up," Bella conceded. "But, that's all in the past. I'm sure Peter will see that once we talk."

"Bella—"

"Look, Alice, I don't want to hurt him, okay? I'm not trying to do that, you know that's not me. But if Peter is my one, and I miss him because of some stupid misunderstanding over my best friend, then I'm going to be miserable for the rest of my life. _The rest of my life_, Alice," Bella told her emphatically. "I just want a chance to talk to him. I don't know what's going to happen, but I have to take the chance. Please, help me take that chance."

Alice remained silent, watching Bella carefully for several minutes. Bella did her best to hold Alice's studying gaze, allowing her to see all of her vulnerability.

"Please," Bella implored.

Alice closed her eyes and bobbed her head. "Okay. I don't think this is the best idea, but I'm not going to stand in your way. If you and Pete are supposed to be together, then I won't stop you."

"Thank you, Alice," Bella sighed. "Really, Alice, thank you," she said again, grabbing her hand and squeezing it tightly.

"I can't promise you anything, Bella," Alice said. "He may not want anything to do with this," Alice said.

"I know, and that's fine. But still, I have to take the chance, right?"

"Right."

"Okay, so do you know if he's in town? Do you think I could see him this weekend?"

"Wow, you're not stalling, are you?" Alice teased, smiling lightly.

"I think I've done enough of that," Bella laughed. "So? This weekend—Sunday maybe?"

Alice shook her head. "No, sorry, he's in New York until Tuesday. But I know he'll be in town until after the wedding once he's here. Maria has threatened his ability to further the family name if he even thinks of taking off again and missing out on his brother's big day. And you _know_ how insane that woman is… How she ever had a son as calm and loving as Jas, I'll never know," Alice said.

Bella laughed in agreement, having firsthand knowledge of Maria Hale's brand of crazy. That was one thing she didn't relish revisiting, but for love… well, Bella would do anything, it seemed.

* * *

**a/n: Keep your families close, share your love freely and remember that even in the darkest night, if you have faith, there will be light. My thoughts, heart and prayers are with those in Newtown.**

**Thank you for reading.**


	6. Chapter 6

**5.**

"I'm hungry."

"You should have eaten the fruit, then."

"How is fruit supposed to fill me up? I'm a grown man, not a mouse, Beans. I need more than a few grapes and apple slices to get me through the day," Edward grumbled.

"Well, _Teddy_, if you're such a grown man, you can get your own breakfast instead of relying on me to do it for you. Otherwise, eat what I provide, you big baby," Bella replied with a quick pointed look before she returned her eyes to the highway.

Edward muttered too lowly for Bella to hear, which was just as well since she was lost in her thoughts.

It was Sunday, and the pair were on their way to Mount St. Helens where Benjamin Morsey waited, unsuspecting and unprepared.

Not that Bella was feeling very prepared herself, but at least she knew why she was going. Benjamin was completely unaware that Bella and Edward were on the way.

The duo had argued over whether or not to notify the men before showing up, with Edward's logic prevailing in the end. He helped Bella see that showing up in the lives of her old flames would seem more like a happy coincidence and less like a need for Bella to have a straight jacket, if she spouted off her need to 'find her soulmate' as a reason for seeing them again.

Now, the two friends were driving south, music softly coming from the speakers. They chatted while Edward tried to keep Bella from getting lost in her thoughts too much, though it wasn't working very well if the furrowed lines in her brow were any indication.

Before long, Bella was pulling her small sedan into a parking space at the Forest Learning Center, allowing the engine to idle as she collected herself.

"Ready, Beans?" Edward asked from beside her a few minutes later.

She wasn't sure, knowing that the man who could possibly be her soulmate was within her reach. There was only one way to find out though, so Bella took a deep breath, grabbed Edward's hand and squeezed it tightly for a moment, to give her strength.

"I think so," she said hesitantly.

"Let's go re-meet the future Mr. Beans. Do you think this one will be wearing a tweed jacket and red tie, too?"

"You are such an idiot," Bella said with a roll of her eyes, though his silly joke had done its job, loosening the knot Bella felt in her chest.

They strolled leisurely into the Center, taking in all its beauty and information. They walked casually side-by-side around the exhibits, watching children run around, playing in the sandboxes or dragging their parents to different fact wall placards.

Bella had to pull Edward out of line for the helicopter simulation, his childish whine and pouty lips nearly enough to win his case, but Bella was on a mission. Now that she was inside, she needed to find Benjamin and, somehow, start a conversation that could lead to her happy-ever-after without her coming off as a crazy person.

As it turned out, Bella wasn't the one who would end up coming off as crazy.

"I think that's him," Bella whispered, pointing discreetly toward a man standing off to the side of an exhibit, his shoulders turned inward as he held a clipboard protectively to his chest.

"Let's do this, then," Edward said as he rubbed his hands together and stepped forward, stopping when Bella put a hand on his arm, pulling him back.

"Wait, I need you to promise you won't say or do anything stupid," she stated, her eyes serious as she stared at her best friend.

"Me? Do something stupid? I think I'm offended," Edward said in faux offense.

"You shouldn't be, since almost everything you say or do is stupid. But Edward, this is important, so please, let me do the talking and just… be normal, or something."

"You have my word," Edward answered, holding his hand up in the boy scouts' symbol.

"Why does that not comfort me?" Bella muttered as she moved toward the man, Edward trailing just behind her.

"Um, excuse me," Bella softly spoke when she was closer, the man startling slightly while he clutched his clipboard closer again.

"Y-yes?"

"I'm sorry to bother you, but I just wondered… well, you wouldn't happen to be Benjamin Morsey would you?" Bella asked, smiling timidly.

"I'm Dr. Morsey, yes. Is there something I can help you two with?"

"Oh, gosh! I thought I recognized you. I'm Bella, Bella Swan from Forks High?" Bella said. "We, um, sort of dated our freshman year, if you remember…" she trailed off hopefully.

"Bella, Bella… oh, Bella! Yes, oh, hello. Yes, how are you?" Dr. Morsey said, a light of recognition catching in his dark brown eyes.

"I'm good, doing good. And um, this is Edward Cullen, he transferred to Forks our Junior year."

"Right, yes, Edward, hello. Good to see you as well," Benjamin replied, extending his hand for a quick shake, before attempting to discreetly wipe his palm off on the white lab coat he wore.

"Well, what brings you two to Mount St. Helens?"

"Oh, um, I was just… well, I find it all rather interesting, living so close to a volcano and all. And I realized I'd never even been here before, which is just such a waste when you think about all the history we have sitting in our own backyard," Bella rambled nervously. She hadn't thought out what to say very well at all, and it was showing.

Luckily for her, Dr. Benjamin Morsey didn't seem to care, as his eyes danced in excitement.

"Yes, exactly! We are a part of living history, right here in Washington and not nearly enough people take advantage of it. I'm so glad you are doing so, Bella. It is disheartening that the field is so misunderstood. I mean, look at this data I'm collecting here," he explained excitedly.

He went on for the next twenty minutes about various geological statistics, from rock formations and lava crusts to plate tectonics and surface erosion which were beyond Bella's comprehension. Frankly, they were also beyond her interest, but she did admire the passionate way he spoke. Bella imagined having that sort of passion directed at her would be quite enjoyable, given the right circumstances.

"That's so fascinating!" Bella gushed, seeing a way in with her long-ago ex, since bringing up their time in high hadn't done much. "It's just so interesting. Would you, well… oh, never mind, I couldn't ask that of you."

"No, please. Ask. I love to answer questions about my little volcano, if I can," Benjamin said lightly.

"Yeah, Bella. Ask him," Edward chuckled, pushing her gently forward.

Bella glared at Edward over her shoulder, barely resisting the temptation to stick out her tongue, instead plastering on a smile and returning her attention to the slightly awkward, unkempt scientist before her.

With a smile, Bella said, "Um, well, do you think you might be willing to discuss this more with me sometime, Benjamin? I mean, I don't know if your wife would mind, but I'd be willing to meet you after hours so you don't get in trouble with the Center. I've actually, uh, been wanting to do a story like this for the paper. I'm sure the editors at The Seattle Bugle would love it as an interest piece."

Benjamin appeared unaffected by Bella's blatant fishing, merely pulling out his phone from his pocket and staring at it intently for a few minutes. "Yes, I might be able to squeeze you in sometime later this week. If the data collection is successful for the lava dome, I should be available to give you an in-depth interview later this week. Otherwise, I'm afraid I won't have time until after the New Year, as I have an important speaking engagement at a conference in Arizona. And my personal life won't be affected, as work comes before those trifle things. Truthfully, I don't see much point in spending time away from the work I love," he chuckled.

"Oh, um…" Bella swallowed, shock in her eyes as she regarded the scientist in front of her. She couldn't believe what he'd just said, so coolly and disaffected, as if he truly had no care or time for personal things.

Bella suddenly got a flash of her future with Benjamin, long nights and lonely days in which she was constantly passed over for work he deemed more important. She could see how sad and hollow her life would become if she pursued something with him, much like the volcano crater Benjamin so obviously worshiped.

Biting her lip, Bella glanced over to Edward, who was standing quietly to the side. She gazed at him, silently asking him what he thought.

His furrowed brow and pursed lips combined with a subtle shake of his head let Bella know he also didn't think this was the right path.

Bella may be desperate for love, but she wasn't willing to believe her destiny was to come second best to a pile of rocks and ash for the rest of her life.

Benjamin Morsey was not her soulmate.

And as she set up a tentative appointment for an article she never intended to write, Bella was left wondering, once again, just who was her soulmate?

And more importantly, would she find him in time?

* * *

**a/n: Thank you so much for reading, and for leaving such wonderful reviews. I know I don't reply to everyone, and I wish I could, but I think we'd all prefer another update versus a review reply, right? Right.**

**Awesome beta is awesome, and mauigirl60 is definitely awesome. Thanks for all your hard work, doll. I do make a changes on occasion after she's done her magic, so any mistakes that remain belong to little 'ol me.**

**See ya soon loves!**


	7. Chapter 7

**6.**

Though it was tempting, Bella didn't allow herself to get discouraged when she realized Dr. Benjamin Morsey wasn't the man for her.

Instead, she moved on to the next name on her list, her first college boyfriend and, subsequently, the first man she'd ever slept with.

It was an experience that, thankfully, had improved over time, though Bella begrudgingly admitted that she rarely saw the stars and consuming white light of completion that so many women claimed.

Bella decided that looking after herself in that department wasn't the worst thing that would happen in her life.

No, the worst thing would be ending up alone.

With that thought in mind, Bella turned her attention back to the scrap of paper that held the address she'd copied down earlier in the morning .

_Liam McKenna, Edenberry, Ireland_

It wasn't promising, that was for sure.

Ireland was a long way off from Seattle, and although Bella was serious in her quest for love, she didn't think a trip across the Atlantic was feasible.

"Whatcha doing?" Edward asked, his voice pulling Bella's attention to her office doorway. He leaned casually on the doorframe, a fitted black sweater pulled snug across his chest while his dark jean-clad legs crossed at the ankle, one heavy black boot toe thudding dully on the linoleum.

Bella ran her eyes over his lean frame, appreciating the fine cut of his body, the sharp line of his jaw and even the disarray of his auburn hair, standing on end for no other reason than Edward likely forgot to run a comb through it after rolling out of bed.

Bella swallowed, her mouth dry, as she gazed at her friend.

Edward Cullen was one good looking man, which was always clear to Bella. But some days, days like this one, there was no other way to describe him other than drop-dead sexy.

When his pretty mouth curved into a wicked smirk, Bella knew that Edward knew it too, and some of the appeal was lost.

But only some.

Shaking the thoughts from her head, Bella cleared her throat to speak.

"Edward, hey! What are you doing here?"

"I was in the neighborhood, thought I'd stop by and see what you're up to," Edward explained, walking forward to flop down in a hard-backed chair in front of Bella's small desk. "So, how goes it?"

Bella smiled, touched that he was concerned for her. "Nothing is happening, really. After the Benjamin debacle, I took it pretty easy. Rose came by for a bit last night to discuss the engagement party."

"Oh, yeah? What's the plan for that?" Edward asked, picking up a frame on Bella's desk to look at. He smirked again as he held it up, obviously amused to see a picture of himself and Bella, a wide smile on his face as his arm wrapped around Bella's neck, while she'd batted at him ineffectively to stop.

"It seems the couple has requested we do a combined bachelorette/bachelor party that, while tasteful, will still be fun. Rose and I decided we should all go out for dinner at The Crab Pot and then head over to Rock Box for entertainment and drinks."

"Rock Box?" Edward questioned.

Bella nodded. "Yeah, it's a pretty cool karaoke bar. We can rent out a private box so it will be more intimate, and if Emmett ends up naked, well, we'll be the only ones around to witness the horror."

They both laughed loudly, Bella feeling a chill run down her spine due to the mental flashback of having already seen that image before, on numerous occasions.

Emmett, God bless him, tended to take his clothes off the more alcohol that he drank.

And he drank a lot in college.

"Oh, Jesus, I haven't missed seeing his pasty ass on display," Edward chortled.

"Whatever you say, Cullen. I know you secretly crave seeing Em in all his bareback glory," Bella teased.

"Hell no, Beans. He's not who I want to see bare, that's for damned sure," Edward told her with a poi lavious look.

"No? Hmm, could have fooled me after that Spring Break party back in '07," Bella said, grinning wryly.

"You swore you'd never speak of that night!" Edward exclaimed, his green eyes flashing in mild panic.

"Oh, Teddy, don't you worry, your secret is safe with me," Bella told him, smirking. "Although, I think it might be time people know why I call you Teddy…"

"Don't you dare, Bella Marie Swan! I mean it!," Edward demanded, his fingers gripping the table's edge tightly.

"Okay, okay, calm yourself. I promise, Edward. No one will know about you waking up half dressed next to a fully naked Emmett in a dorm room with only a teddy bear between you, with no memory of the night before."

"How's the ex-boyfriend search going, Beans?" Edward asked, changing the subject. "Find anymore misanthropes we can bother?"

"God, Benjamin really _was_ a misanthrope," Bella agreed. "I don't know when that happened. He was fully invested in people in high school. Well, at least Tia Rodriguez."

"Maybe she broke his heart and he swore off women. Or, maybe he was so captivated by the _fascinating_ backyard history here in Washington, that he couldn't help but fall in love with volcanoes."

"Why did I take you?" Bella muttered, covering her face with one hand and shaking her head.

"Because you love me! You need me to tell you if any of these schmucks are the right one or not. You're afraid that since you missed him once already, you'll do it again if you don't get someone to help you. You know I won't sugarcoat shit just to make you feel better," Edward stated.

Bella looked up in shock. Edward was right. She needed him for _exactly_ that; there was no one else she trusted to do so.

She'd had no idea Edward realized that. He was a lot more perceptive than Bella gave him credit for, she supposed.

"Um, yeah. That sounds about right," Bella replied softly.

Edward smiled, before reminding Bella she hadn't really answered his question.

"Oh, uh, yeah. Well, it's not looking great. You know Liam McKenna, the next ex on the list?"

"Right?"

"Well, it turns out he went back home - to Ireland."

"Ah, so that's a no-go on finding Liam then?" Edward wondered.

"Yep. Especially since his Facebook wall is covered with pictures of him and his pretty red-haired wife and daughter. I don't think they'd take too kindly to my showing up and trying to steal him away," Bella shrugged.

"Probably not," Edward agreed. "So, who's next?"

"That would be Diego Martinez," Bella said, a small smile on her lips as she thought of him.

"Diego, Diego… remind me who this one is?"

"Diego, you remember me telling you about him. We got together senior year at UDub, he was an aspiring actor/writer. We dated for six or seven months."

"Oh, yes. The actor," Edward replied, nodding. "And just what is he up to, these days, according to the all-knowing Facebook?"

"Just because you're too good for Facebook doesn't mean the rest of the world isn't into it," Bella scoffed at Edward's disdain.

Edward waved a hand dismissively, and Bella let it go, unwilling to have the old argument once again. Although, she still stood by her assertion it would be easier for them to have kept in contact while Edward was away had he gotten a page.

Then again, nothing quite made her smile like getting a phone call or text from him; even better were the handcrafted picture postcards he would randomly send her.

Those were the things she would always cherish, and most likely wouldn't have received if they'd relied on a social network site to be their go-to contact.

"So, how did you find Diego then? I'm assuming you found out something about him," Edward said, pulling back into the present conversation.

Bella bit at her lip for a moment, knowing before she even said anything how Edward would react. "I used the database at the paper," Bella admitted.

"Wow, look at you," Edward whistled. "What would your Ethics professor think?" he tsk'd.

Bella knew it was unethical to be tracking her exes with company resources, but she didn't have many other choices. There was no way she was asking her Chief of Police father to help with her crazy scheme which left little else, considering Facebook and Google hadn't turned up much information either on most of the guys.

"Yeah, well, I guess some lines are bound to get blurred in the pursuit of happiness, right?" Bella remarked.

Edward rubbed his chin for a moment, before nodding his head in agreement. "Yeah, too bad it can't just tell you who you're looking for and save us from having to visit these yahoos."

Bella silently agreed, wishing the answer to her personal dilemma was easier to find.


	8. Chapter 8

**7.**

Bella flopped onto her couch exhaustedly, her head lolling back as she sighed loudly.

She and Edward had just returned from Port Townsend, where Diego Martinez worked for a small mechanic shop.

The trip had been another failure in finding Bella's true love, which was made abundantly clear after a very tedious lunch with her ex; he proceeded to tell Bella about his three ex-wives, five children and an alimony schedule that was "fucking killing him" financially.

The final nail in the coffin was when Diego attempted to proposition Bella, telling her he could find a place for her in his regular rotation of women if she was game, so long as she was on the pill.

Bella had left promptly, going to pick Edward up from a nearby bookstore he'd agreed to wait at, while Bella tried to reconnect.

Now, back in Seattle, Bella was exhausted, both in body and spirit. She really didn't know what she was going to do next, her attempts to rekindle an old flame into an everlasting inferno failing miserably.

Edward, being the kind man he was, had offered to pick dinner up for Bella, giving her a few moments to wrap her mind around the very real possibility that she might end up alone forever.

She would probably become one of those cat ladies, living with five felines in a drafty apartment, flowered mu'umu'us and purple hair as her go-to look.

That would royally suck, considering Bella hated cats.

Maybe there was someone else, someone she'd left off her list. Bella decided to look through her Facebook friends; surely there was an ex still lingering in the background of her life.

Bella was only up to the Cs when Edward knocked on her door. She quickly let him in, focusing back on her search, and ignoring the delicious scent that wafted in the air from the brown paper bags he carried.

"What are you doing?" Edward asked, placing the food on the rustic, white coffee table in front of Bella. He began to pull out various styrofoam containers as Bella answered.

"I'm going through my friend's list to find any exes I overlooked before."

"Um, okay…"

"Well, the first list I made turned out to be shit, and I only have three weeks left before the New Year. Desperate times call for desperate measures, Edward."

Edward didn't say anything, allowing Bella to focus on her search and, instead, went to the kitchen to get drinks and silverware.

"Fuckin' hell!" Bella shouted, slamming her laptop closed and pushing it off to the side, her arms folding angrily across her chest.

"No luck, huh?"

"Not unless I've suddenly decided I like girls, because the only guy I could find was James Vickers, who is now a Jessica, according to his recent status and post-op pictures," Bella groused.

Edward tried but failed to hold back his laughter, his green eyes misting over in his amusement.

"It's not funny," Bella grumbled.

"Oh, but Bella, it really is. What if…" Edward snickered, "what if you were the last woman he dated before he decided he was meant to be a woman himself?"

"How is that funny?" Bella demanded in a huff.

"Think about it, he went gay because of you!"

"No one said he was gay, he's just a she…" Bella trailed off.

"Oh my God, if you dated, would you share clothes, do you think? I can just see you fighting about whose heels belonged to whom."

"Shut up!" Bella cried, her glare not doing much as Edward continued to chuckle.

"Damn, Beans. What is with these guys you've dated? Are they all such winners?" Edward teased.

"You are an asshole," Bella declared, slapping Edward's shoulder as hard as she could.

"Oh, come on, Bella. You know it's funny," Edward said, flashing that smile that won his way every time.

Bella couldn't deny that it was a little funny. And, she really needed to laugh about all the ridiculousness she'd encountered with her exes thus far.

She laughed, her shoulders shaking as she released all the stress from the situation she'd found herself in, Edward joining in.

"You're still an asshole," Bella told him, earning an even bigger laugh from Edward, his head tilted back and his eyes closed. Bella took the opportunity to pounce, paying Edward back for his mean words by tickling him against his ribs, reveling in his girlish shriek as he tried to push her hands away.

They wrestled for several minutes on the couch, each trying to gain the upper hand until Bella fell off, landing with a loud thud on her ass."Oww!" she groaned, as she rubbed at the sore spot.

Edward's laughter died down as he bent over, easily grabbing Bella and lifting her up onto the couch beside him. They ended up leaning against one another, Edward with his arm around Bella's shoulders as they regained their breath.

"You're _still_ an asshole," Bella said, slapping a hand to Edward's hard abs. He grunted, but didn't disagree.

"So, shall we eat?" Edward asked a few moments later, his hand rubbing against Bella's arm.

"Sure," Bella nodded, leaning out of Edward's embrace to peek into the containers. She squealed when she found her favorite comfort food nestled inside: sliced beef brisket; macaroni and cheese; and a side of home-cut fries.

"Is this from RoRo's Pit and Grill?" Bella asked excitedly.

"Of course. I've only heard you rave about it for two years, there was no way I would get barbeque from anywhere else for you," Edward answered, with a smile. Bella smiled back, grateful he knew her so well.

"Oh God, so good," Bella groaned a moment later, practically inhaling her food.

Edward shifted on the couch, clearing his throat before he moved to get his own food. "Fuck, this _is_ good," Edward moaned after his first bite.

Bella looked over, watching as Edward licked his lips to gather the residual sauce that lingered there.

_Damn_, that was sexy.

Bella allowed her eyes to travel over Edward, once again realizing what an attractive man he was. She felt a hot flush cover her skin when he began to suck on his fingertips, the dark barbeque sauce coating them.

Shit, if Edward could do that to his fingers, Bella could only imagine—

The shrill sound of her phone ringing halted Bella's thoughts.

The number flashing across her screen didn't register, but the voice that offered a warm hello after she answered did.

"Peter, hey," Bella sighed, her heart picking up speed. She glanced over to Edward, a hopeful smile on her face. She didn't miss the roll of his eyes and the faux excitement he showed by doing jazz hands, but she ignored it, more focused on the man speaking in her ear.

"Isabella, hi. It's good to hear your voice," Peter's low-timbered voice replied.

"You too," Bella answered truthfully. They made polite conversation for a few minutes, catching up on their jobs and families.

"Hey," Edward whispered from beside Bella. "I'm going to head out," he said, his face devoid of any emotion.

"Okay, talk to you later," Bella whispered back quietly, glad Edward could tell she needed some privacy to have this discussion. She waved goodbye as he walked to the door before turning her attention back to Peter.

"So, Alice called me," Peter said a few moments later. "She said you were hoping to speak with me, about something to do with us."

"Um, yeah. I wanted to talk to you, get caught up. And I know I'll probably see you at the wedding, but um, well, I wanted to see you before then if possible," Bella said, biting her bottom lip.

Peter sighed, hesitating for a few long moments in silence. "I don't know, Isabella. Is that really a good idea?"

"I think it might be," Bella told him softly. "We could get coffee or something. Nothing major, I swear."

"It's not that I don't want to see you, Isabella," Peter reassured. He sighed again, and then said, "You know what? Why not? What's it going to hurt to have a cup of coffee?"

"Exactly. I just want to clear the air, before the wedding," Bella said, leaving out the part where she hoped to get him to agree to date her again.

She'd save that for the coffee date.

"All right, I think I can do that," Peter agreed, causing Bella to smile widely. They quickly set up a time and place to meet the next afternoon, before wrapping up their conversation. "I'm looking forward to seeing you, Isabella," Peter told her, the smile in his voice clear.

Bella hoped hers was as well when she replied, "You too. Bye."

Bella sunk back into her couch, her phone clutched in her hands, and sighed giddily.

Her search for a soulmate wasn't going to be in vain after all.

* * *

**a/n: Many thanks to all of you for reading and to my awesome beta mauigirl60 for all her hard work! I know some of you are wondering when Bella is going to wake up and see what's right in front of her—have faith, it will be soon. But the slow burn is kinda fun, so stick with me. **

**See you soon!**


	9. Chapter 9

**8.**

"I should be finished with my meetings by five, so I can pick you up around 6:30 at your apartment. Will that work for you?"

"Yeah, that sounds great. See you then," Bella replied with a smile.

Things with Peter were going well, she was pleased to note, and she couldn't have been happier for that.

Bella had been nervous about her coffee date with Peter, about the questions he would have and the issues he would raise.

She knew that Peter had always been insecure of her relationship with Edward, the close nature and easy way they were with one another, which was one of the factors leading up to Peter and Bella calling it quits. Of course, Bella never saw it as a problem; instead, hating the time and distance Peter's job took him away from Seattle.

Now, with her future happiness on the line, Bella was willing to let those issues go. And, after reassuring Peter that she didn't have romantic feelings for Edward, the pair had agreed to slowly begin seeing one another again.

Coffee led to drinks a few times after work, which led to dinner on Friday night, and Saturday. They spent most nights on the phone, and Bella had gotten several 'thinking of you' texts from him.

She was more than enthusiastic in her reply of 'yes' when Peter asked her to attend Jasper and Alice's engagement party the night before. Now that the final details had been cleared up, Bella was on a mission to make herself look irresistible.

She was going to take things slow with Peter, but she did want him to desire her and a sexy, fitted cranberry red dress was the way to do it.

It wasn't long before Peter arrived to pick Bella up, greeting her with a warm kiss on the cheek, and giving her an approving head-to-toe appraisal.

"You look wonderful, Isabella," Peter said, holding Bella's hands in hers.

"Thank you. You look nice yourself," Bella replied, enjoying the finely-cut, black suit and deep blue tie that rested on Peter's fit frame.

"Shall we go?"

"Yeah, let's."

The pair made their way out to the car, chatting amicably as Peter drove them to the Rock Box where the party was being held.

Once inside, they were led to their private box, where many of the other guests had already arrived.

"Bella, Peter! You're here!" Alice exclaimed, rushing over to greet them with a warm hug.

"Hey, Alice," Bella greeted her, releasing Peter's elbow to hug her friend. Alice gave Bella a pointed look when she stepped back, her eyes darting to Peter and back to Bella, with a smirk.

Bella rolled her eyes, but could feel a light flush on her cheeks.

"Hey there, girlie," Jasper said, sliding over to give Bella his own hug after saying hello to Peter. "My kid brother treating you right?"

"You bet," Bella smiled up at Peter, enjoying the warm blue of his eyes when he smiled down at her.

Rosalie appeared, along with Emmett, and another round of hellos ensued. Once everyone was settled, Rose spoke.

"Well, everyone's just about here. We've already got food out so you won't have to wait on that. And, the wine and beer is over there, just help yourself to whatever. Don't forget to sign up for your song choice as soon as you can!"

Bella laughed, knowing it would take a few rounds with her friend, Jack Daniels, before she would be up for that, but knowing it would happen before the night was over. She enjoyed cutting loose and being silly too much to not indulge when the opportunity presented itself.

"Hmm, I think I'll be passing on that," Peter said. Bella wasn't that surprised, Peter never was one to make a fool of himself, even if he was among family and friends.

The couples made their way across the room to a set of chairs around a high table, found their seats and began working on the drinks and appetizers Rose had mentioned.

The night was going well, filled with friendship and laughter. Bella was excited to see her friends' acceptance of her and Peter as a couple once more.

The only one missing was Edward.

Bella wondered where he was, having not spoken with him very much over the past week. She knew she'd been busy reconnecting with Peter, but she didn't think that would keep Edward from seeking her out as he always did.

At least, she hoped not.

As it was, Bella worried about Edward, deciding to send him a text to see where he was, and if he was on his way.

His reply never came, but he eventually did.

He strolled in with a petite blonde on his arm, who had wide hazel eyes.

Great, Bella thought. Edward was already falling into bed with random bimbos, and he'd only been back a month. She wondered if this one would be as psycho as Chelsea, requiring Bella to save him from her too.

"Hey, kids!" Edward exclaimed, as he arrived at the table, his arm draped around the blonde's shoulders. "Are we ready to get this party started?"

"Edward! Where've you been, bro? I can't get anyone to rock the mic with me," Emmett complained, pouting in his wife's direction, which Rosalie pointedly ignored.

"I had to get my friend, Charlotte, here," Edward said. "She joined the paper at the same time I did, but is new to Seattle, so I thought I'd bring her along to meet you guys. I hope that's all right."

"Of course, the more the merrier," Alice assured him with a smile.

Edward nodded before making introductions of the small group, smiling big when he got to Bella. "And this is Bella Beans, my best friend."

"Just Bella is fine," Bella said, reaching out to shake hands. "It's nice to meet you."

"You too," Charlotte replied, her hand timid and limp in Bella's. Bella gave a look to Edward, but found his green eyes focused on Peter, a tight smile on his lips.

"And this is Petey Hale, Jasper's kid brother," Edward said.

"It's Peter, Edward. You know how I feel about nicknames," Peter corrected, nodding towards Charlotte as he wrapped an arm around the back of Bella's chair.

"Right, of course. My bad, Peter," Edward apologized, though he obviously didn't mean it.

Edward offered Charlotte a seat, sliding in between her and Bella. Bella knocked shoulders with Edward, smiling warmly when his eyes found hers.

"Where ya been, stranger? You move to my city and then disappear on me after three weeks?"

"Eh, what can I say? You lost that lovin' feelin'," Edward crooned.

Bella laughed. "Stop, don't even start. I'm not singing tonight, and even if I were, it wouldn't be that song."

"We'll see," Edward said, grinning wickedly.

Shaking her head, Bella said, "Seriously, Teddy. Where have you been? I've missed you."

"I've been busy at work, getting settled and figuring out assignments. I'm surprised you even noticed I was gone, now that you and 'ole Petey are back on." Edward took a sip of his beer, his eyes averted from Bella.

"Hey now, don't be like that. You know I've missed you, too. It's just... well, you know what this thing with Peter could mean. I told you from the start I thought it could be him," Bella said softly, turning to face her friend so they wouldn't be overheard. "You know he thought there was something going on between us before. And even though I told him there wasn't, it was hard for him to get over it. So this time around, I'm trying to show him how serious I am about him. And it means spending a little less time with you, unfortunately. You get that, right?"

Edward stared at Bella, his eyes full of something Bella couldn't decipher before he gave her a wry smile, his hand finding hers and squeezing it for a moment.

"I do, Beans. I'm only giving you a hard time; you know I only want your happiness. And if it's Peter Hale, and that means less time together, then so be it. But just know, I'm always here for you, no matter what."

"Thanks, Teddy. That means a lot to me," Bella said.

"Um, Edward?" a timid voice broke their bubble. Edward turned to face Charlotte. "I need the restroom, do you know where it is?"

"I'll show you," Bella offered, wanting to be kind to Edward's friend, who had turned out to be anything but a bimbo. She was quite smart, actually, and funny in a subtle, dry sort of way.

Turning to Peter, Bella told him where she would be going, asking him to get her another Jack and Coke while she was gone.

"Are you sure, Isabella? You've already had three tonight," Peter questioned.

"Ah, come on, Petey. Bella knows her limit. Besides, it's a party, let her have some fun," Edward interjected.

"I think you should stay out of it, Edward," Peter replied with a hard tone, standing to his full height.

Edward cocked an eyebrow, also raising to his full height, though he stood a few inches taller than Peter, so he was able to look down on him. "Funny, I don't remember you being Bella's keeper; must have been a recent development, since she's been making all her own choices when she's been with me."

The challenge and tension in the air was thick between the two men. Bella worried her lower lip with her teeth, as fear of what seemed to be brewing filled her chest. She opened her mouth to put a stop to this male chauvinist show, but was saved by anther voice cutting across the room.

"Cullen! Our song's up, bro! Let's go!" Emmett hollered, waving his large arms frantically to signal that Edward should hurry.

Bella sighed in relief, her heart pumping fast in her chest. She didn't know what she would have done if the two men in her life got into an altercation.

Surely it wouldn't come to that.

* * *

**a/n: I want to wish you and yours a very Merry Christmas! Thank you for taking time out from family to read and possibly review. I'll see you with another chapter soon. :)**


	10. Chapter 10

**9.**

"What the fuck was that all about?" Bella demanded, poking Edward hard in the chest, once he emerged from the restroom after he and Emmett finished their song. She'd been waiting, not so patiently, since she had brought Charlotte there earlier.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Bella," Edward said dismissively, pushing her hand away.

"Don't _even_, Edward Cullen. You know what I'm talking about. That little male dominance display with Peter. What were you thinking?" Bella huffed, her hands on her hips.

"What was _I_ thinking? What were _you_ thinking, Bella? Since when do you let a man tell you what you can and can't do?" Edward asked harshly. "Oh, wait, that's right, about a year ago, since the last time you and that asshat were dating."

"You don't know what you're talking about," Bella said hotly. "Peter doesn't tell me what to do, I make my own choices."

"That's not what I've seen," Edward said, crossing his arms over his chest, his biceps flexing. "You're doing whatever he says or what you think he wants just because you think he's your 'one'."

"Then maybe you need to take a better look, Edward. I'm not your responsibility. We may be best friends, but I don't need you to protect me or try to solve my problems."

"Could have fooled me," Edward told her, his green eyes sparking. "But, hey, if that's what you want, then fine. I'm out of it; find your soulmate on your own, since I'm not needed."

"What—no, that's—" Bella tried to speak, her words tangling and catching in her throat, as Edward brushed past her with a cold indifference. Bella stood gaping in the hallway, her thoughts confused.

_What the hell had just happened? _

Bella had wanted to speak with Edward about his stupid actions, but how had it ended up in such a huge fight? She and Edward rarely ever fought, and never with such heated words.

A huge knot suddenly formed in the pit of her stomach, squeezing and tightening everything inside of her as she replayed the conversation over again.

_Had she been way off base, overlooking Peter's offense because she wanted him to be the 'one' so badly?_

Bella looked to the table, finding Edward leaning close to Charlotte. His hand strummed along her back slowly while he whispered in her ear, as though they hadn't just had the biggest fight of their friendship.

White-hot anger, tinged with a an emotion she was hesitant to label, flared in Bella's chest before she realized she had no right. She was the one who had started their fight and, if she was honest with herself, Bella knew Edward was right.

"Damn," Bella cursed lowly, shaking her head. She needed to make this right and there was only one way she could do that.

Minutes later, Bella made her way back to the table where everyone was sitting, minus Edward and Charlotte, who had left the private box for some fresh air, according to Rose.

Alice leaned over, "Everything okay?"

"Yeah, sure. Why?" Bella asked.

"It seemed like you and Edward were in a pretty heated argument over there is all."

Bella shrugged. "Nah, we're good." She reached for her drink, scowling when she saw the glass still empty.

"You didn't get me another drink?" Bella said, turning to Peter.

"You've had enough, Isabella. We should probably be going soon, at any rate. I have an early flight to Chicago in the morning to catch."

"You didn't tell me you were leaving for Chicago. I thought you were supposed to be here until after the wedding." Peter merely shrugged, which caused Bella's anger to flare again. "How long are you going to be gone?," Bella asked sharply, not liking hearing this information for the first time in the middle of her friend's engagement party.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart, I thought I'd mentioned it already," Peter offered with a placating smile, leaning over slightly to kiss Bella on her head. "But, don't worry, I'll be back to take you to the wedding."

"Wonderful.," Bella said with a roll of her eyes. She couldn't believe what an ass Peter was. Edward really was right; she'd been so blinded in her quest to find the 'one', that she was willing to overlook all the red flags in the way.

Bella was going to have to do some major rethinking about her soulmate and what she was willing to do in her quest to revive love.

One thing was pretty clear, Peter Hale, as handsome and successful as he was, wasn't the one for her.

"Next up, Teddy and Beans! Come on up, kids, I'm playing your song!" The disembodied voice of the DJ announced.

"Look, Peter, you may want to go home early, but I don't. I'm here to celebrate Alice and Jasper building a life together, so I'm staying. It's been great catching up with you, but this isn't going to work out. I'll be taking myself to the wedding, thanks." Bella turned on her heel, walking to the stage quickly to take her place, not looking back at the overbearing jerk behind her.

Edward hadn't shown up yet, but the music had already begun. Bella took a deep breath, her words a little shaky as she sang.

"I really can't stay…

I gotta go away…

This evening has been…"

Bella swallowed thickly, tears beginning to prick at her eyes as she continued to sing solo. Bella was sure this would work; Edward would sing this song for her whenever she was feeling down, knowing how much she loved the duet and its cheesy romance. Bella always protested, saying she hated it, but she and Edward both knew it wasn't true. If Edward wanted to put a smile in her heart, he only needed to sing this song, no matter the time of year.

Bella had hoped by initiating it herself, it would have the same effect on him. Now, as she began the next chorus, Bella wasn't so sure she wasn't just making a fool of herself.

"The neighbors might think…

Say… what's in this drink…

I wish I knew how... to break this spell…"

"Your eyes are like starlight now," Edward's rich voice rang out from the side door, a huge smile on his face as he made his way to the stage with long strides. Bella grinned widely, her eyes sparkling with joy and relief as she continued to sing, now feeling complete with her partner next to her.

"I ought to say no, no, no sir…"  
"Mind if I move in closer?..."  
"At least I'm gonna say that I tried…"  
"What's the sense of hurtin' my pride?"  
"I really can't stay…"  
"Baby, don't hold out…"  
"Ahh, but it's cold outside!" they both sang loudly, facing each other with bright eyes and wide smiles, their free hands clasped together as they finished the song.

The round of applause that followed was barely heard, as Bella pulled Edward into her arms, hugging him tightly. "I'm sorry," she whispered by his ear, standing on her tiptoes so he could hear.

"Me too, Beans."

The pair pulled apart, warmth radiating in Bella's body as she looked at Edward. He was so close, his green eyes soft and sincere as he gazed down at her. Bella could feel a thrill run through her body, noticing the fine cut of his jaw and the full swell of his lips that turned up into a smile Bella knew was reserved solely for her.

She felt so right in his arms, so good and comfortable. Bella never felt more at home or at peace than when she was wrapped in Edward's arms, surrounded by his warmth and his spicy scent. He was always there for her, understanding her silly quirks and intricacies like no one else could.

It hit Bella in an instant, the truth of realization like a solar flare as it burst from the sun, arching high and wide, brilliant in its power, beauty, and grace.

Edward.

It was _Edward_.

The man she'd been looking for, the counterpoint of her soul, was _Edward_.

And he'd been here all along.

"Edward, I—"

"Thanks for the song, Beans," Edward said softly, rubbing Bella's arm gently and lightly squeezing her shoulder, as they moved off the stage. "We should talk, but I told Charlotte I'd get her home so…"

"Oh, but… um, I really wanted to talk to you," Bella stuttered, her need to tell Edward her revelation immediately ready to burst on her lips.

"I know, and we will, but I should go. This isn't really my first night out with Charlotte, we've had lunch a few times and well, we've kind of hit it off, so…" Edward said with a light chuckle, his hand rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

"Oh... Oh! Um, okay, well…" Bella trailed off, her heart thudding painfully before seeming to fall to the bottom of her feet.

"I'll call you later, Beans. Have a good night," Edward said, hugging Bella quickly once more, his lips pressing a soft kiss to her hair before he stepped back and turned to Charlotte, who was waiting for him with a soft smile.

Bella watched him say his goodbyes, tracking his every move with her eyes, feeling her heart slowly breaking.

She'd missed her chance. He'd been right in front of her all along, and now it was too late.

_Why hadn't she seen it before?_

"I know that look," Rose commented quietly beside Bella. Bella sniffled, wiping the moisture from her cheeks, before turning to her friend with a forced smile.

"What's that?"

Rose smirked. "The look of a woman in love with a man she doesn't think she can have."

"What? I—" Bella started, but Rose held up a hand to stop her.

"Bella, please. I know we aren't the closest of friends, but trust me when I say, you _can_ have him."

"Rose, really, it's not like that."

"It is, Bella. For both of you. You just need to make Edward see that you see it now."

"It's too late, Rosalie. He's with _her_ now," Bella admitted with defeat.

"Only because he thinks you want Peter. Explain it, Bella."

"I don't know if I should. If she can make him happy…" Bella said, shrugging dejectedly.

Rose scoffed, giving Bella a pointed look. "Bella, I don't pretend to know everything, but I do know this, if you don't make Edward yours, you'll regret it forever."

She knew Rose was right; it was exactly what Madame Tanya predicted, and precisely what Bella feared most.

Knowing she loved Edward, but couldn't have him, would be the loneliest fate imaginable.

* * *

**a/n: And finally, Blindella sees the light! (Love that nickname, btw- though I can't remember who dubbed it.) **

**Some of you are wondering what took so long, but hey—it happens all the time in real life. Luckily, now that Bella is aware, it won't be long until things are set right, I promise.**

**Thanks to the beta for all her hard work and thanks to you for reading! Until next** **time.**


	11. Chapter 11

**10.**

Bella paced the length of the small room, her teeth nervously biting into her bottom lip, the tulle of her satin champagne-colored dress scratching her legs as she went.

A week had passed since her realization that Edward was her 'one'; the other half of her heart, the missing piece to her puzzle, and all the other clichés that meant soulmate. The only problem was that Bella still hadn't been able to confess her discovery to Edward.

Not for lacking of trying, but each time Bella attempted to get in contact with Edward by phone or in person, Edward seemed to brush her off; either too busy or tired from work, or God forbid, out with Charlotte (though he'd never directly said it, Bella just assumed).

To say Bella was hurt by Edward's brush-off would be an understatement, especially considering she had something so important to tell him.

Now that she knew how she felt, Bella was nearly bursting at the seams to tell him, needing him to know it right then so no more time would be wasted.

Bella didn't know what the hell had taken her so long to see it, to recognize the sparks she felt when they touched, the easy and playful banter they shared. The way he just _got_ her all equaled to Bella not simply loving her best friend Teddy, but being _in love_ with Edward, the man.

God, how had she been so blind?

Of course, that didn't matter at the moment. What really mattered was getting Edward in the same room with her, alone, so she could confess her feelings. She hoped and prayed it wasn't too late, and that what Rose said was true; that Edward returned her feelings too.

"Bella, would you stop? You're making me nauseous. I just got over my afternoon sickness from these two so, please, stop," Rose pleaded, rubbing her swollen belly as she sat in the chair in the corner. "What's got you so wound up?"

"Nothing, sorry," Bella said, moving to sit, though her leg bounced as soon as she reached the loveseat.

"It doesn't look like nothing," Rose commented, her brown eyes studying Bella carefully. After a moment, she said, "You haven't told him yet, have you?"

Bella closed her eyes and sighed. "No, I haven't. I've tried, but…"

"But what? You need to tell him, Bella and fast. This…" Rose said, gesturing to the way Bella couldn't stop fidgeting, "…isn't good for you, nor will it solve your problem. What's holding you back?"

"It's not that simple, he—"

Before Bella could continue, Alice swept into the room, beaming brightly, her ivory cream gown softly swishing, her dark hair pinned into curls around her head, and adorned with small flowers and jewels.

"You look beautiful," Bella gushed, rising to give her friend a hug. "The prettiest bride I've ever seen," she said, stepping back.

"Thanks," Rose playfully grumbled, moving in to hug Alice as well. "Though Bella's right, you do look gorgeous. Jasper isn't going to know what hit him when he sees you coming down the aisle."

Alice laughed, her face glowing with love and happiness as she looked at her friends. "I can't wait to see him. God, it'll be all I can do to not jump him when I see him in that sexy-ass suit, I swear."

"And there's the Alice we all know and love," Bella chuckled, laughing harder when Alice stuck out her tongue.

The girls chatted for a few minutes, making last minute adjustments, before there was a tap at the door. Alice called out for the person to come in.

"Hello, girls," Maria Hale, soon-to-be mother-in-law, called, her sharp face pulled tightly from a little too much Botox. Her dirty blonde hair was loose around her shoulders, hiding some of the hideous poinsettia patterns that adorned her green gown.

Alice had been lamenting over it ever since she'd first seen the damned thing, but no amount of gentle dissuasion would get Maria to change her mind on wearing it. She wanted to be festive for not only her son's wedding, but also the season she'd claimed.

"Are you about ready? The band will be starting in a few minutes. You need to be lined up outside the sanctuary doors before then," Maria told them.

"Of course, Mrs. Hale, we'll be there shortly," Alice answered, smiling as pleasantly as she could.

"Excellent. You don't want to be late, it would be very disrespectful to your guests," Maria stated. "Although, clearly, some of you don't care about respecting others," Maria said cattily, pursing her thin red lips as she shot a pointed look at Bella.

Bella did her best to let the slight slide off her, but it was clear from the questioning look Alice sent her way, as well as Rose's raised brows, that Maria's purpose had been fulfilled.

"What was that about?" Alice asked after Maria disappeared.

"I…um... I…" Bella couldn't seem to speak, her fingers sliding along the smooth material of her dress near her hip.

"She dumped Peter because she finally realized she and Edward are meant to be together," Rose said flatly, as though it weren't a big deal.

Alice's eyes jumped to Bella, whose cheeks were now tingeing pink in embarrassment. "Really?"

When Bella nodded, opening her mouth to apologize for doing exactly the opposite of what Alice had warned her of weeks before, she was cut off by Alice raising a hand.

"Honestly, I don't want to hear it. While I hope you didn't hurt Peter, I can't say I'm surprised. You and Edward have been inevitable since forever; I'm glad you finally see it. You could have had better timing, but whatever, it's done now," she said with a shrug. "Now, I'm getting married to the man of my dreams in about ten minutes and once that's done, feel free to go get yours," Alice said authoritatively, before striding from the room, her bouquet of red roses in hand.

Bella stood rooted to the spot, shock and awe in her wide brown eyes as she watched Alice leave.

"Well, you heard the bride," Rose commented with a wry grin. "Let's go get her married. Then you can get your man."

Bella followed her friends to the atrium in a bit of a daze, the music swelling from the sanctuary inside as the processional began, first with Alice's cousin Lucy walking, then Rose, each carrying a single white rose.

It was only moments later that it was Bella's turn, the doors opening for her descent down the aisle.

She was nervous, her heart thumping loudly in her chest, as all eyes in the congregation turned to her. She started wobbling in her heels, something she hadn't done since she first started wearing them at sixteen. Her breath caught in her chest, nerves gripping her as she proceeded.

Then, as Bella looked up the aisle to the altar, her eyes connected with the soft, warm green eyes she'd looked to for support for many years.

Edward.

He was there, smiling warmly, softly as he gazed back at her.

Bella felt the knot in her chest leave, her heart stopping and starting in another furious pace for an altogether entirely different reason.

Bella smiled serenely in return, her head high and eyes locked with Edward's. As she moved forward, her gaze never veered from his handsome face, as she took her place beside Rose.

He gave her a wink, smirking lightly at the blush that covered Bella's cheeks. The wedding march began to play, and everyone turned to watch for the arrival of the bride.

Bella continued to stare at Edward in wonder for a few seconds before tearing her eyes away to Alice, love and happiness filling her chest as she watched her friend meet her future husband.

When the preacher began to speak, Bella tried to focus on what was going on, not wanting to miss her friend's big day by being lost inside her head. Her eyes found Peter beside Jasper before she quickly moved her gaze outward, finding Charlotte in the audience in a blue dress, sitting prim and proper.

A twist of ugly, green jealousy pulsed in her gut before Bella moved on, seeing the smiling faces belonging to friends and family of Jasper and Alice, all sharing in their joy.

Bella wanted that for herself, she wanted it more than she could say.

She looked across the aisle, finding Edward standing tall, his dark suit hugging his body perfectly, his hair as wild and tousled as ever, making Bella's body hum with a range of emotions and desires.

She wanted it all with Edward; the man of her dreams, who was standing not even four feet away. He must have felt her eyes on him, burning hot and bright, because he looked over, his eyes happy, yet reserved, as he gazed back. He gave her a lopsided grin, the one that was only for her, and it nearly burst Bella apart.

Suddenly unable to hold it back anymore, Bella's need to tell him overwhelmed her completely.

"It's you," she mouthed, her eyes never wavering from the green depths of Edward's. "It's always been you."


	12. Chapter 12

**11.**

Frustration was gnawing at Bella, the need to speak with Edward pounding in her heart and mind. Instead, she was forced to endure the multitude of activities that came with being a bridesmaid.

First, there was walking down the aisle with Peter, who was clearly not happy to be seeing Bella so soon after their latest split. Then, there were the millions of pictures to be taken.

Edward was there, of course, but it wasn't the opportune time to have an important conversation, though he did whisper to Bella that they would talk later. After photos, there was the reception - which included dinner, dancing, cake, and bouquet tossing - and, of course, even more photos to be taken.

By the time the party seemed to be winding down, Bella was feeling hopeless.

She'd endured many guests asking when it would be her turn, while watching her friends share in their newly-wedded bliss; all the time her eyes drifting off to find Edward, his attention usually on his date, Charlotte.

Rose was no help, having taken a seat next to Emmett and barely moving since the cake was passed around, except to use the restroom several times. She did manage to throw some very pointed looks Bella's way when she caught her mooning over Edward, as he twirled the flower girl, Angela, around the floor.

Bella wished she were in Edward's arms, the two short dances they'd shared not nearly enough for her. When another song ended and more guests stood to leave, Bella sighed. It didn't seem she and Edward would get to talk, his charm and charisma keeping his dance card full.

Bella wondered if he'd forgotten about it altogether.

A feeling of dejection washed over her, her teeth finding her bottom lip, as her eyes felt a telltale sting.

Casting her eyes toward Alice and Jasper, entwined together as they slow danced to a classic love song, another emotion overtook Bella.

Determination.

What was wrong with her? This _woe-is-me_ attitude wasn't Bella.

No, Bella was the woman who went after what she wanted, even if it seemed crazy. Hell, she'd been chasing down ex-boyfriends in the hope to rekindle love just so she wouldn't end up alone.

Now that she finally knew whom she was meant to be with, Bella wasn't going to let him get away, simply because she was scared.

_Fuck that!_

Shoulders back and head held high, Bella marched over to her best friend, sliding her hand around his arm and pulling lightly to get his attention, which was currently focused on his mother.

"Excuse me, Mrs. Cullen, do you mind if I steal Edward for a minute? I need to speak with him about something," Bella said, smiling sweetly.

"Have I ever, dear?" Esme grinned, the sparkle in her eyes brighter than usual due to the wine she'd freely sipped. "Go right ahead. I want to speak with Cynthia about this delicious meal and see if she'll give me a name so when my baby here is ready for _his_ big day, it will be as nice as Alice's."

Edward groaned, his free hand scrubbing his neck as he shook his head. "Ma, really? I'm not even _close_ to getting married."

"_I_ think you're closer than _you_ think," Esme giggled, glancing to Edward's side as she smiled widely.

"Right, I'm going to take Bella out for some air. Dad, maybe you should get Mom some water," Edward said to his father, who was sitting beside his wife, a bemused smile in place.

"Always good to see you, Bella," Edward's father Carlisle called, as Edward tugged her away, taking her across the room and out onto the fairy-lit patio.

"So…"

"So…" Bella repeated, her lip catching between her teeth once more, as nerves overtook her.

She and Edward were alone, but now that the moment was here again, some of her courage was starting to slip away.

"You look beautiful tonight, Bella," Edward told her softly, a small smile on his lips.

"Thank you," she replied, returning his quiet grin. "You look nice yourself."

"I do clean up pretty good, huh?" Edward said, smoothing invisible lines from his suit and tie. "The ladies seem to love it, that's for sure," he joked with a wink. "I mean, did you see the way Angela couldn't keep her little hands off me? She was practical wrapped around me all night."

"Well, it could be because she's over a foot shorter than you, and kept tripping on your giant clown feet," Bella retorted with a laugh.

"Meh," Edward shrugged. "You say po-_ta_-toe, I say po-_tah_-toe."

Bella shook her head, turning to look out over the small garden below. Moonlight cast a silver glow over the flowers and trees, bathing them in a beautiful, ethereal light. Bella shivered in the cool night air, trying to find a place to start.

She felt the smooth, warm fabric cover her bare shoulders, the spicy sent of Edward's cologne surrounding her as he slid his jacket around her small frame.

"Thanks," she quietly said, offering Edward a gentle smile.

"So… what's up, Beans?" Edward asked a few moments later.

Bella inhaled deeply, preparing herself for what she needed to say. She turned slightly to the side, her gaze finding Edward's concerned but curious eyes watching her.

"I don't know how to say this, so I'm just going to say it, okay?"

"Okay."

"You know how I've been looking for my 'one'? Well, I think I finally found him. Only I don't know how I'm supposed to get him to fall in love with me, because he probably doesn't even see me as anything more than what we are, but I have to take that chance, you know? Because if we were together, I know,_ I know_, nothing would be greater than us."

"Bella," Edward attempted to say, but Bella didn't allow it, as she nervously rambled on.

"The worst part, even more than him not loving me, is that he _might_ have loved me, but because I was too blind to see it, too afraid to let myself believe he might feel for me what I've always felt, even though I buried it deep inside, is that— all of that aside— I may have already lost my chance before I even got it."

"Bella, slow down," Edward tried again, his hands grasping hers.

"No, Edward, you don't understand. It's _you_, okay? It's _you_! That's what I was trying to say at the altar. _You_ are my soulmate, the one I'm supposed to have my 'happily ever after' with; now I can't because I was too stubborn to see it, and you've got Charlotte now! And I get it, okay? I get that it's _my_ fault, that I waited too long to see you for who you really are to me.

"You're more than just my best friend; you're the man I love. And even if I spend the rest of my life alone because you don't want me, at least I'll know I tried. At least I'll know that I never held back my real feelings from you, that I gave it my all to find true love. And it's your loss, Edward Cullen, because we could have been amazing together. We would have been everything," Bella finished with labored breaths, her eyes swimming with tears as she faced him.

"Are you finished?" Edward asked, his voice steady and calm.

Bella bit her lip, doing her best to keep the tears from falling, as she nodded.

"Then it's my turn to talk," Edward said. He turned Bella to face him, his hands rubbing her arms as he spoke. "You are such a stupid girl, do you know that, Beans? Do you know how stupid you are for thinking, for even one second, that I could give my heart to anyone besides _you_? Hell, you've had it in the palm of your hands since I was a senior in high school, and you blew me off after prom. I think I've probably loved you since I was eighteen years old, Bella Swan, and even though it's taken us ten years to get here, there is no way in hell I'm letting you get away from me now."

"What?" Bella stuttered, unable to believe what she'd heard, though the frantic rhythm of her heart already knew.

"You heard me, Bella, but if you want me to say it again, I will. I love you," Edward stated, honesty and conviction burning in his green eyes, as he gazed at Bella steadily. His thumbs rubbed against the column of her neck and the line of her jaw as he stepped forward, moving closer. "And right now, I'm going to kiss you so you'll never forget."

Bella inhaled sharply before Edward's lips found hers, firm and warm, as they rubbed gently along hers. He slowly let his tongue slide along Bella's bottom lip, tickling the seam of her mouth before nipping at the plump flesh lightly.

Bella sighed, her arms wrapping around Edward's neck and her fingers threading through his messy hair as she returned his kiss. Her mouth opened to meet his, tongues caressing and meeting over and over again as warmth and love raced through every vein in her body, spreading to every place in her heart and devouring her soul.

When they finally came up for air, their faces only millimeters apart, both had wide, goofy grins on their faces, their eyes dancing with mirth and love.

"Wow," Bella said dreamily, her eyes unfocused as she continued to grin.

"Yeah," Edward replied, his head quickly dipping down to place another peck on Bella's lips.

"So…"

"So…"

They both laughed, their arms still wound around each other, gently swaying together to the music that filtered through the patio doors.

"What now?" Bella wondered.

"Well," Edward said, a devious look in his eyes. "I think you should let me rediscover why I call you Beans," he said with a wicked smirk.

Bella blushed but clutched at Edward's tie, pulling him closer to her. "I think that could be arranged. But we should probably say goodnight to your, um, _date_…"

Edward rolled his eyes, his hands clasping behind Bella's waist, stroking her exposed skin he found underneath his coat. "Oh, my, Bella, do I detect jealousy? I think I like it," he said, with a wink.

"Jerk," Bella grumbled playfully, though she couldn't keep the smile from her mouth as Edward pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"She's not my date, baby. Not like you think, anyway. Charlotte likes - well, let's just say your friend, Leah, would be more her type," Edward chuckled.

Bella gasped, pulling back to see if Edward was serious. "But I thought…?"

"Eh, she may have been doing me a favor by playing along," Edward said, smiling slyly.

"Are you serious? What the hell has this last week been about then, Edward? Do you have any idea how much it hurt to see you with someone else?" Bella said furiously.

Edward rubbed the back of Bella's neck, his fingers in her hair as he nodded solemnly. "Probably about as much as it hurt to watch you this past month."

"Oh…" Bella's anger deflated instantly, knowing he was right. "Well, why didn't you say something?"

Edward shrugged. "You're so stubborn; I didn't think you'd believe me. Besides, isn't it better that you figured it out on your own?"

"Maybe," Bella conceded. "But you're still an asshole," she said, slapping his shoulder in exasperation.

"True, but you love me anyway," Edward smirked confidently.

Bella smiled in return. "God help me, I do."

* * *

**a/n: Finally, right?! Haha! I hope you liked how it all turned out. There is one chapter/epi left, which will post tomorrow (and really earns our M rating *wink, wink*). **

**I did mess around with this chapter after the wonderful beta mauigirl60 saw it, so please forgive any mistakes you found. See you soon!**


	13. Chapter 13

**12.**

…_**Some years later…**_

"Hey, do you know where the gifts are?"

"Um, under the tree?"

"That sounds a lot more like a question than a statement, Teddy," Bella called out, moving over to rummage in the bedroom closet.

"Maybe we should get your hearing checked then," Edward replied lightly.

Bella rolled her eyes. "Seriously, did you hide them somewhere? It's not like anyone is going to come over just to get presents early."

"Then you obviously don't know Emmett that well, Beans. He's been known to unwrap gifts with a butter knife and rewrap them, when left unattended. I couldn't risk that happening this year."

Bella laughed, knowing what Edward was saying was mostly likely true. Emmett could be such a child sometimes, not that Edward was much better.

Bella just loved him more, so she was willing to overlook it - most of the time, anyway.

"A-ha!" Bella shouted in triumph, pulling a shiny green package from the back corner shelf. "Got one! Are the rest up here?"

"Yeah, sure. They're all up there," Edward said, his hands sliding around Bella's waist as he came up behind her. "Keep reaching, I'm sure you'll find them."

"You can't help?" Bella asked, the smile in her voice clear as she shifted back slightly into Edward's warm embrace.

"Nah, I've got a great view of your ass from here," Edward teased, kissing Bella's neck softly, earning a small moan in return.

"Edward," Bella panted, her heart beginning to race as Edward continued to lavish her neck in kisses, sucking lightly on the skin before moving to nibble on her ear. "We can't. We have to get over to your parents' house for…um,…unh, gifts… and... stuff..."

"I think I'd like to unwrap _this_ gift first," Edward chuckled darkly, sliding his hands around Bella to gently cup her breasts. "It feels like it might be just what I asked for."

Bella's head fell back to Edward's shoulder, her eyes closing as she lifted a hand to tangle in his hair. "Yeah? You've been a good boy?" she panted.

"Oh, yeah. The best, baby. Now, let me see if Santa brought me what I wanted this year," Edward teased, turning Bella around to face him. He cupped her face, his lips meeting hers in a firm kiss that expressed so much more than simple words could say.

The couple continued kissing and embracing, hands and lips heating up into a passionate fury, gripping, nipping and tugging at one another. Before long, Edward had lifted Bella from her feet, carried her to their bed and began removing her clothes.

"Oh, yes. This is looking exactly like what I asked for," Edward said huskily, licking his lips. His green eyes burned hotly as he watched Bella's pale skin coming into view, as each article was discarded onto the floor.

"Edward," Bella sighed, her body arching up as he lay kisses along her stomach and ribs. His hands danced across the hard peaks of her breasts and teased the sensitive skin between her hips. "Off. Please." She tugged on his shirt to emphasize her point.

Edward didn't need any more encouragement, rising up to pull the fabric over his head as Bella moved to unbutton the fly of his jeans. She pushed the denim down, Edward's cock springing forward to meet her. Her eyes glazed over in lust and desire as she stared at him - hard, thick, and long - always ready for her.

"Fuck, the way you look at me," Edward groaned, reaching to pull Bella into a heated kiss. Bella retuned his fervor, her hand moving to pump his cock.

"Shit, unnhh," Edward moaned, his head dropping to Bella's shoulder as he watched her work him over.

"Enough," Edward grunted after several minutes. "I want to be inside you."

"Yes, please," Bella agreed hungrily, her eyes burning coals of lust as she moved back on the bed, her hands running up Edward's firm chest and arms, her nails scratching his strong back while he hovered over her. She sighed in satisfaction as Edward moved to her breasts, flicking her nipples expertly with his tongue before sucking them into his mouth one at a time, his long fingers teasing her pussy. "Fuck, Edward!"

Edward moved into the cradle of her legs, the tip of his cock teasing the wet, hot entrance that awaited him. "Mmm, fuck. You're so wet, baby," Edward said.

"Edward, now! Put your cock in me, _now_," Bella demanded, her hands moving to grip his ass, pulling him forward to where she was most desperate and needy for him.

Edward pushed in, groaning loudly at the warm sensation of her tight body accepting him. He leaned forward to connect his mouth with Bella's, kissing her deeply, as he began slowly moving his hips.

"Yesss!" Bella hissed, wrapping her legs around Edward as he began to pick up his pace, meeting him thrust for thrust.

"Fuuuck, that's good!" Edward reached down, pressing and circling on Bella's clit, the moans and groans of her pleasure pushing him closer to the edge.

"Yes, God! Edward… so good!" Bella echoed his ecstasy as they shifted against each other in need.

"You almost there?" Edward panted, his eyes locked on Bella's, watching her eyes intently. Bella felt the connection in her bones, singing in her blood and pouring out of her body as she moved with Edward, fluid and strong, each giving to the other what only they could provide.

"Yeah, yeah... almost, almost… a little bit…unh, yes, yes, yes!" Bella shouted, reaching her climax as Edward continued stroking into her, hitting the spot that made stars appear, while he frantically rubbed her clit.

"Bella!" Edward grunted a few moments later, his own orgasm overtaking him, his body shuddering and face twisting into the sight Bella loved most - pure, unadulterated pleasure. And it was all thanks to her.

Bella grinned proudly to herself, stroking Edward's sweaty back as he lay on top of her, his breath still escaping him in hot puffs on her neck.

"Best. Present. Ever," Edward managed to say, earning a laugh from Bella, which made him wiggle on her chest. He pushed up onto his forearms, grinning down goofily at Bella. "What? You don't agree?"

"Meh, I've had better," Bella teased, feigning indifference as she crossed her arms. She loved that she could be so playful after sex, during even, on occasion. She'd only ever had that with Edward, and she knew she always would.

"Oh, you're going to get it, Beans," Edward threatened, reaching to tickle her sides. Their laughter rang out in the room as they wrestled along the bed, sweaty and happy, twisted in the messy bed sheets.

"I'm kidding! I'm kidding!" Bella shouted between peals of laughter, as Edward continued his assault.

"Say it. Say it, out loud, Bella! Say I'm the best!"

"You're the best!" Bella shouted through her laughter, though she meant every word.

"Damn right! Don't you forget it," Edward remarked, his hands turning from torturous tickling to caressing touches. He moved his fingers to trace the lines of Bella's face, his eyes reverent and tender as he gazed at her.

"I love you, Beans," he said, leaning in to kiss her swollen lips.

"I love you, too, Teddy. Always," Bella said, her hands holding his face carefully. "I'm sorry it took so long to see it."

Edward shook his head. "Doesn't matter. We _did_, that's all that matters now."

Bella nodded her agreement, placing a kiss on Edward's lips. "We should probably get up so we can get going."

Edward groaned his protest but moved off Bella so they could get dressed. "Dibs on the first shower!" Edward shouted, rushing off to the bathroom, his naked ass jiggling.

Bella giggled at the sight, amused, as always, by Edward's antics. Well, most of the time.

"Feel free to join me!" he called from down the hall, right before Bella heard the water turn on.

She laughed softly to herself, gathering up the mess of clothes that had been discarded during their romp and moving them to the hamper.

Bella didn't know how her life had gotten to this point, but she was happy for it. She knew not many people had the kind of love she and Edward shared; both as friends and as lovers. He was hers completely, just as she was his. They understood each other in every way, tolerated each other's faults and praised one another's success.

Things weren't always easy, but Bella knew in her heart of hearts, she was on the right path.

Her destiny, her fate, was all tied up in the man down the hall, singing loudly off-key.

"Been hoping that you'd drop by…

Beautiful, what's your hurry?..."

Bella grinned to herself, moving quickly down the hall and slipping into the shower, her voice joining Edward's, as they sang their duet.

They shared more kisses as they showered, Edward paying special care to Bella's breasts and ass, which led to Bella paying special attention to Edward's dick with her mouth.

"Hey, babe?"

"Yeah?" Bella asked, wrapping herself in a towel after they'd finished their shower.

"When we have babies, you know what I'm going to call them?" Edward said, his eyes mischievous as he looked at Bella in the mirror, knotting his towel loosely on his hips.

"What's that?" Bella wondered, already knowing she would regret it.

"Beanie Babies! Get it, 'cause you're my Beans?!" Edward said excitedly, his eyes lighting up like a child.

"You are such an idiot," Bella replied, shaking her head and patting Edward's damp chest as she left him and the bathroom behind, though the smile she wore belied her words.

She couldn't wait for that day, and she didn't need a psychic to tell her that.

* * *

**a/n: And there we have it! The end of Beans and Teddy's story. I hope you enjoyed it.**

**I can't tell you how much your reviews and support has meant to me on this little journey. I started this as a way to kick-start my writing for my other fics and it worked—yay! These two did steal a place in my heart though, and I hope they did in yours as well.**

**Until next time, happy reading. **


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